


Mickey Muffin

by EG Challenge Submissions (6mgs7), got_milkovich



Category: Shameless (US)
Genre: Blow Jobs, Canon Divergence, Collars, Dancing, Dirty Talk, Disney, Domestic Ian Gallagher/Mickey Milkovich, Drinking, EGChallenge3, Explicit Language, Explicit Sexual Content, Fluff, Gallavich Halloween, Halloween, Halloween Challenge, Halloween Costumes, Humor, Kink, M/M, Nipple Play, Partying, Smut, Song Lyrics, Teasing
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-10-30
Updated: 2018-10-30
Packaged: 2019-08-09 20:04:34
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 6,519
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/16456370
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/6mgs7/pseuds/EG%20Challenge%20Submissions, https://archiveofourown.org/users/got_milkovich/pseuds/got_milkovich
Summary: Halloween is finally here, and this year, the Gallaghers are throwing an epic Halloween bash! Ian sets out to make a dish for the party, but it doesn’t quite go according to plan, partially in thanks to his black-haired, forgetful grump of a boyfriend.It’s okay, though. Ian has the perfect plan for revenge in mind.Payback’s a bitch for one Mickey Milkovich.





	Mickey Muffin

**Author's Note:**

> What happens when you combine seeing a “Mickey Muffin” on the menu at The Chicago Diner in Boystown with a very interesting conversation about what Cam might smell/taste like? This ridiculously silly bit right here! This story was primarily inspired by my trip to Chicago this past summer for Season 9 filming, and it is dedicated to the 3 lovely ladies who were there with me! Love yall!
> 
> Also, thank you to the lovely ladies who read over/beta’d this thing for me. You know who you are, and you know I appreciate you! Love yall as well!  
> HAPPY HALLOWEEN, FUCKERS! Enjoy!  
> <3 got_milkovich (AO3/Insta)

Ian didn’t even make it to their alarm, practically springing out of bed before the first note of “Love Is A Battlefield” could start playing. Ever since he and Mickey officially moved in together, Ian had gotten the best sleep of his life, and why wouldn’t he? Besides the overnight shifts he sometimes had to work, Ian had the love of his life in his arms on a nightly basis, and finally in their very own space. These days he was more than happy to hit the snooze button so he could snuggle with his man a little longer, especially after a long night of fucking like bunnies, but not this morning. Halloween was his favorite holiday; it was finally here, and he was way too excited to sleep any longer. This year, Fiona decided to throw a huge Halloween bash at her apartment building, and Ian insisted on helping her with the food and décor. After all, the Gallaghers could throw a party unlike any other South Sider, especially when they combined forces in preparing for it.

Not to mention, he really owed her one. Fiona allowed Ian and Mickey to “rent” one of the apartments since Mickey went legit and started working for her. He started off working at Patsy’s, and he helped fix washers and dryers as needed when she bought the laundromat. When she sold the laundromat and bought the apartment building, Mickey helped her renovate it while still working part-time at the diner when they were short-staffed. As a token of her appreciation, she let Ian and Mickey have first pick at choosing an apartment in her building. Ian was beyond grateful for that, and for Fiona giving Mickey the chance he deserved, knowing that she could finally see in Mickey what Ian had seen for so many years.

Ian looked over at his boyfriend lovingly, reaching out to cup his face and stroke his temple. He kissed Mickey on the forehead gently, whispering a soft “love you” before standing up. Mickey grumbled at the sudden absence of Ian’s warmth, mumbling something incoherent before he abruptly rolled over, pulling the covers over himself. Ian giggled, threw on a pair of boxers then turned to walk to the kitchen.

“Alexa, play Halloween music.”

Ian still couldn’t believe they owned a damn Alexa. It was a housewarming gift from Fiona, and while it was seemingly boujee as all fuck, he couldn’t deny the fact that he loved the stupid thing. Mickey pretended like he hated it, but Ian had caught him on several occasions headbanging to death metal and playing air guitar. It was both ridiculous and the most adorable thing he’d ever seen in his life.

Ian turned the oven on to preheat, then danced his way over to the refrigerator to pull out the ingredients for pumpkin spice cupcakes with cinnamon cream cheese frosting/filling, Sue’s recipe. He didn’t buy into the whole pumpkin spice craze like his sisters did, but he had to admit that Sue’s cupcakes were fucking delicious. He knew they were going to be a huge hit at the party. He even thought Mickey might like them, despite his hatred for “fancy ass white girl shit,” as he so lovingly called it. He kicked the refrigerator door closed and set the ingredients on the counter. Still bopping along to the song, he made his way over to the cabinets, pulling out bowls of various sizes, a hand mixer, cupcake liners, and the dry ingredients the recipe called for. Once he had everything he needed laid out in front of him, he pulled a spatula out of the drawer and got his bake on.

Ian was placing the cupcakes into the oven as Michael Jackson’s “Thriller” began to play. That song was his jam, and he was getting so insanely excited he could hardly contain himself. He grabbed a clean spatula and mixing bowl and began combining the ingredients for the frosting. Once the butter and cream cheese were well-beaten, he added the powdered sugar, vanilla extract and cinnamon. The song was reaching its peak, and he was hardcore dancing around at that point, even stopping what he was doing to perform some of the iconic moves from the music video, using the spatula as a microphone. He came back to the mixing bowl full of ingredients, still bopping along to the beat excitedly. He turned on the hand mixer as he was jamming out, but his excitement caused his finger to slip and accidentally switch the mixer to high speed, sending powdered sugar and cinnamon flying everywhere.

“FUCK!”

He ended up wearing most of it, and because it freaked him out when the ingredients started flying, he also knocked the bowl of frosting onto the ground.

“SHIT!”

Ian quickly grabbed some paper towels and a wet rag and started to clean up the mess he had just made all over the floor, silently cursing at himself for jamming out a little too fucking hard. The oven timer started to beep as he finished wiping up the last bit of mess. He grabbed an oven mitt and pulled them out, all 24 of them looking and smelling like absolute perfection, but would he have enough time to fix his frosting faux pas?

He checked the time on his phone. Luckily it was still pretty early in the morning, and the nearest grocery store was only about 10 minutes away. Figuring he could use a run to burn off his frustration, he cleaned himself off as best he could, threw on a hoodie, sweatpants and sneakers, kissed Mickey on the forehead again, then headed out the door.

Ian flew down the staircase toward the front door of the building where he saw Fiona sweeping the front entryway.

“Hey sweet face! You’re up kinda early…ready for the party tonight?”

“Hell yeah I am! I’ll be back soon to help, but I gotta run to the store first. Let’s just say I’m literally wearing part of my food contribution for tonight.”

“Oh damn…okay, no prob. Where’s Mick?”

“You really have to ask? He’s…still in bed,” Ian replied with a smirk.

“Nope. Got it.” She knew exactly what that meant. It also explained the noise complaint she received from another tenant around 2:00 that morning. As Ian left the building, she just smiled, shook her head and continued sweeping. Fuck it…she could deal with a disgruntled tenant. She was just glad her brother was healthy again, and happy.

 

*******

 

Not too long after Ian left for the store, Mickey began to stir, grumbling and wondering where his redhead was. He knew Ian wasn’t much of an early riser anymore, unless of course he was in need of a morning fuck. Mickey was not a morning person by any means, but if the circumstances were just, he’d make an exception. And Ian’s dick was ALWAYS an exception. They had one hell of a workout the night before though, and Ian had the day off, so Mickey couldn’t understand why the fuck he was up already. Mickey slowly sat up and rubbed the sleep out of his eyes before he made his way to the bathroom. Ian wasn’t in there, either. _Hmm…weird_. Mickey threw on some sweatpants, then made his way out to their living room. Still no sign of Ian. _And why does it smell like that pumpkin shit in here?!_ He headed for the kitchen, where he heard the damn Alexa playing Halloween music. _The fuck?!_ As if she were a real person, Mickey flipped Alexa off.

“ALEXA, SHUT THE FUCK UP!”

Alexa was privy to that command by now, but she clapped back this time with a smartass reply, prompting Mickey to unplug her ass from the wall.

“Bitch.”

It was too early for that shit. He needed coffee, and he needed it now. As he made his way further into the kitchen toward the coffee pot, he found the source of the pumpkin smell.

“Muffins?” Ian’s thing was pancakes whenever he cooked breakfast for them, so why the fuck did he make muffins this time? And why that pumpkin spice shit when Ian damn well knew how he felt about that crap?

“Eh, fuck it.” Mickey was pretty fucking hungry after burning what had to be a fuck ton of calories once Ian was finished with him, so he reluctantly grabbed one. He pulled the paper back, took a bite, and paused for a moment.

_Mmm…holy fuck...this shit is…good? Or am I really just THAT fucking hungry? Fuuuuck…._

He couldn’t believe his body was defying him. But even so, he grabbed a couple more muffins before grabbing his coat and heading out for his morning smoke.

Fiona was still sweeping the front entryway of the building when Mickey was on his way down the stairs. She smiled brightly at him.

“Morning, Mick! You’re up early…sleep well?” Like she had to ask, but it was fun trying to get a reaction out of Mickey whenever she could.

“Yeah…fucking amazing.” _She’s awfully fuckin’ chipper this morning…_ “You seen Ian?”

“Yeah, he just headed out not too long ago…said he had to run to the store. Something about wearing whatever it is he made for the party tonight?”

“Uh…what?” Mickey said, confused as all hell. He shoved another muffin into his mouth.

“Yeah he said he was making something for the party tonight. For the Halloween party. You know…because today is Halloween? Don’t tell me he forgot to tell you about it…he’s been way too excited about it NOT to tell you. Hell, I think I even mentioned it to you earlier this week.”

Mickey just stared back at her, brows furrowed, looking even more confused now.

“Christ, Mick…did you forget?”

Mickey looked down at the remaining muffins in his hand, then looked back up at her.

“Shit. Maybe? I dunno.” _Fuck._ He did have a bad tendency to push mentions of fucking Gallagher get-togethers out of sight, out of mind.

“Oh boy…Ian’s gonna be pissed when he finds out you forgot. IF he finds out. How ‘bout it’ll be our little secret, huh? Don’t let him find out…you know how much he loves Halloween.”

“Yeah. Yeah sure, okay. Need me to do anything today before the party?”

“Nope, take the day off. I got this. You’ve done more than enough around here this week. Thank you.”

“No problem,” Mickey said with a hint of a smile before he walked out the front door. He still wasn’t used to this side of Fiona, the side of her that was friendly with him. That respected him, and gave him a chance. He wasn’t exactly sure where it came from, but he figured it had a lot to do with Ian.

Speaking of Ian, Mickey knew he was in deep shit. Somehow he knew he wasn’t going to be able to play this one off, but he’d damn sure try. He leaned against the front of the building, lit up a smoke, and proceeded to eat his last pumpkin shit muffin while he tried to come up with a game plan for handling Ian’s impending wrath.

 

*******

 

Mickey was in the kitchen when Ian returned, halfway through yet another muffin. Ian walked into the kitchen, set down a bag of groceries, and proceeded to walk toward his boyfriend for a kiss.

“Morning! You’re up earlier than I—THE FUCK?”

Mickey shoved the last half of the muffin into his mouth, looking at Ian with the most innocent of looks he could muster up. “What? Thanks for breakfast, by the way. Would have waited for ya, but I was fuckin’ starv—”

“Mick, that’s not breakfast! Those are the cupcakes for the party tonight!”

“Bald cupcakes? Those are muffins, bitch. Where’s the frosting?”

“That’s why I went to the store. The first batch of frosting didn’t go so well. And from the looks of it, I guess I won’t need as much of it now!”

“I really did think you made breakfast…”

“Mick, when the fuck do I ever make muffins for breakfast? I’d never buy all this shit normally. I always make pancakes and eggs. Your favorite. You know that. And besides, why the fuck would I make US pumpkin spice muffins? You hate pumpkin everything.”

“I—”

“Bullshit, Mick. You forgot, didn’t you?”

“I…” Mickey sighed and threw his hands up in defeat. He knew Ian would see right through him. He knew Mickey better than anyone else did, inside and out. Literally.

 _Time for plan B_. Mickey was more than sure this one would work.

“Yeah. Yeah, I did. M’sorry. Been so busy lately, the days just seem to all jumble together now. I’m always so exhausted. Guess that’s the price I pay for going legit, huh?” Mickey said with a dramatic sigh, attempting to make himself look and sound sad. He hoped his little guilt trip was working on Ian so far, although honestly, it wasn’t like he was really lying. He really was exhausted from work most of the time.

“Or maybe…” Mickey quickly switched his demeanor, flashing his sexiest smile before grabbing Ian’s hoodie and pulling his boyfriend flush against his body. “Maybe I’m exhausted because a certain redhead can’t seem to get enough of me.”

Ian could feel Mickey’s cock twitching between them, which put his body on high alert. Goddamn, he was a fool for a playful Mick. He was so fucking sexy when he was like this. How could Ian resist that?

Ian pushed Mickey back against the kitchen counter, pinning him down with his hips. Fuck being mad. Mick was right. Ian was insatiable when it came to his black-haired grump with the ocean eyes and perfectly plump lips and ass.

Ian stroked Mickey’s cheek with his right hand. “You have something on your lip.”

“Yeah? How ‘bout you clean this bad, dirty boy off then? I mean, I have been pretty bad…” Mick replied in a low, seductive tone with a devilish glimmer in his gorgeous blue eyes.

Ian continued to cup Mickey’s face, but reached his thumb over to Mickey’s lip to wipe away a crumb. Mickey licked the pad of Ian’s thumb and grazed it slowly with his bottom teeth, never losing eye contact with Ian, loving watching his bright green eyes grow dark with desire. Ian moaned as he went in for a kiss, taking Mickey’s bottom lip in between his own, sucking and biting with increasing intensity before taking their kiss further, their tongues dancing around each other with hot ferocity.

Mickey unzipped the front of Ian's hoodie then slid his hands up Ian's bare chest to his shoulders to push the hoodie off, revealing Ian's perfectly toned, god-like torso. Mickey eventually broke their kiss and went for Ian’s neck, licking and sucking the soft spot just below Ian’s ear that he knew would drive him absolutely wild. He continued further down his neck until he reached the dip of Ian’s collarbone, lapping at it with his tongue, sucking and leaving marks as he traveled to the other side.

“Mmmm…you taste like sweat and–” Mick’s mouth traveled up the opposite side of Ian’s neck, lips grazing where he felt Ian’s pulse. “Cinnamon.” He laughed softly against Ian’s neck. “Such a hot, dirty muffin man.”

Mickey felt him shudder as Ian’s cock grew even harder against his thigh. Mickey knew how much Ian loved his dirty talk. He was going to milk it for all it was worth, too.

“Speaking of muffins…” Ian kissed his way down Mickey’s neck, down to his collarbone, returning the favor and leaving marks along his southbound journey. He bent down and took Mickey’s left nipple into his mouth, sucking and nibbling gently as he lightly pinched then rubbed the pad of his thumb across the other nipple.

“Ahhhh,” Mickey threw his head back, moaning with pleasure. Ian kissed his way down to Mickey’s stomach, still kissing and sucking as he got down on his knees and gripped Mickey's waist firmly.

“Mmmm, love this so much, Mick…my favorite muffin.” Mickey looked down at Ian and let out a small laugh, meeting and locking in on Ian’s eyes. His pupils were blown out, and Mick knew at that point, his ginger was gone. Lost completely in desire.

_Checkmate._

Ian continued his journey south and kneeled back, his eyes now level with Mickey’s cock, which was still trapped inside sweatpants. Ian hooked his fingers inside the band of Mickey’s pants and pulled them down swiftly. Mickey’s cock sprung free, and Ian grazed his lips against the tip, wetting his lips with nothing but Mick. Ian shot Mickey a sexy little smirk before he opened his mouth to take Mickey in, achingly slow.

Mickey shivered and his eyes remained glued to his stunning ginger, watching him move effortlessly around his cock. His tongue was wrapped around the underside, intensifying the friction and suction even more, and swirling his tongue around the tip before he took Mickey back in.

“Ahhhh Christ…yes…fuck, right there…” Ian hummed around his dick, shooting what felt like an electrical current throughout Mickey’s body, causing him to buck forward to the back of Ian’s throat. On that note, Ian squeezed Mickey's soft ass and picked up the pace, knowing his lover was teetering close to the edge.

Mickey snapped his head back, almost hitting it on the cabinet behind him, panting furiously. “Shit…gonna come, Ian…so close….so close, baby…”

Once Ian heard that, he promptly pulled back, releasing Mickey’s dick with a loud pop.

Mickey’s breathing slowed down, and he looked down at Ian, who had the biggest fucking shit-eating grin on his face.

“The fuck, Ian?! Why the fuck did you stop?!” Ian stood up, cupped Mickey’s face with both of his hands and kissed him.

“I think you forget I know you better than anyone. I know what you were doing…and if you think you’re off the hook, you’re not.”

“You motherfucker…so you had to leave me fucking hanging here then? What’re you doing, punishing me? Can’t fuckin’ believe this shit…”

“Trust me, baby…this isn’t your punishment.”

“The fuck you talkin’ about?”

Ian kissed him again. “The party tonight is a costume party. Don’t worry, I’ve got us covered.”

“ _Us_? Oh fuck no…Ian, I am not wearing a fucking costume. Abso-fuckin-lutely not.”

“Please, Mick? For me?” Ian puckered his bottom lip and gave Mickey “the chin,” along with the biggest puppy dog eyes he could make. He knew Mickey couldn’t resist the puppy eyes or the chin.

“Nope, not falling for your puppy bullshit this time…”

“Ya know, it’s funny you say that…”

“Huh?”

Ian pouted. “Don’t worry about it. You made your choice. That’s too bad you’re choosing blue balls, though. Trust me…once you see what I’ll be wearing tonight, you’ll regret that decision.”

Mickey took his bottom lip in between his teeth, shaking his head in defeat.

“Goddamnit, Ian. Fine, you fuckin’ win. What the fuck do I have to wear?”

“Oh, you’ll see,” Ian said, walking towards the bag of groceries so he could start remaking the frosting/filling for the remaining cupcakes.

“Do I at least get a fuckin’ hint?”

Ian turned his head to look at him, shit-eating grin back in place.

“Disney.”

Mickey glared at him. “Son of a bitch…” He knew exactly where Ian was going with this, and he was not one bit fucking thrilled about it. The things he fucking did for his Firecrotch, and for dick. Fucking ridiculous.

Mickey made a silent promise to himself to start writing shit down so he’d never forget anything ever again.

 

*******

 

It was finally Halloween night, and the party was already starting to kick into high gear. Ian and Fiona spent the afternoon decorating the shit out of the entire apartment building, inside and out. Cobwebs with various sizes of spiders all over the light fixtures and staircase, mannequins draped with sheets to look like ghosts, spooky music and sound effects, creepy quotes written in fake blood on the windows and wall mirrors, Christmas lights in Halloween colors lining the doors and staircase rails, fog machines, pumpkins for days—you name it, they had it. Even the food and drinks display looked amazing—the drinks were set up inside of a coffin (which Ian didn’t even want to know how that was obtained), while the food was set up to resemble a graveyard, surrounding the coffin. The place looked absolutely fucking incredible. Ian stood at the top of the staircase overlooking the party, grinning from ear to ear at his and Fiona’s handiwork.

The front entryway was filled with guests in costumes—tenants, Patsy’s employees, some of Ian’s EMT colleagues, just to name a few. He spotted Kev, V, and Lip amongst the crowd as well. Kev was wearing a hospital gown, his bare ass full-on hanging out, and he was covered in fake blood and cuts. V was his very obviously slutty nurse. Lip didn’t dress up, but he was wearing a “Happy Halloween, you Fucking Fucks” T-shirt. Ian laughed and rolled his eyes. _Typical Lip_. Debbie and Liam stayed back at the Gallagher house with Franny, Gemma and Amy. And to be honest, who the fuck knew where Carl was. If Ian had to guess, Carl was either blowing up shit-filled pumpkins on rich people’s doorsteps, or was off trying to fuck whichever girl he was into at the time. Or hell, maybe both. That kid was pretty fucking unpredictable.

Ian turned to walk back to his apartment to get himself dressed for the party. He texted Mickey to tell him to start getting ready while he was finishing up the last of the decorations, but he was doubtful that Mickey did so. Shit, just getting Mickey out of the apartment was going to be hell on earth, let alone getting him into a costume to go to said party. But much to Ian’s surprise, Mickey was fully dressed, laid back on the couch drinking a beer when he walked in. Well, almost fully dressed…

“Well shit, Mick, you listened this time. I thought for sure you’d forget what I said again,” Ian said in his most smartass tone.

“Ha ha ha…fuck off, ” Mickey said, flipping him off with one white cutoff-gloved hand. He finished his beer, stood up, and rounded the couch to stand in front of Ian. He spun around. “Is this it? You fuckin’ happy now?”

Ian was speechless for what seemed like several minutes as he gave his boyfriend a slow onceover from head to toe.

“Holy fuck…” Ian said, sounding out of breath.

“What?”

“You…you look hot as fuck.”

“Well no shit, Sherlock. What don’t I know?”

Mickey was wearing yellow sneakers, form-fitting red jeans with a round white patch on each thigh, a black fitted shirt, and white cutoff gloves. Ian was practically drooling at how delicious his man looked, which made him almost forget about the most important part of Mickey’s costume.

_Damn, I did fucking good._

“You’re only missing one thing…” Ian went to their bedroom to fetch the most crucial piece of Mickey’s costume. He hid it from him, knowing Mickey would have destroyed it or thrown it away had he left it out for him with the rest of his costume.

“Ah fuck, now what…”

Ian walked out with a black headband adorned with Mickey ears. He stood in front of Mickey and proceeded to try and put them on him. Mickey dodged him swiftly.

“Fuck no. NO. I am NOT wearing those. I already share a name with the mouse fucker. That’s bullshit enough. I’m not wearing his fuckin’ ears also…”

Ian set the ears down on a nearby table, then pressed his body against Mickey, reaching his left hand down into Mick’s jeans to cup and rub his already growing cock. He wrapped his other hand around Mickey’s neck and pulled him in. He kissed him slow, sucking on his bottom lip, his teeth pulling at it as he pulled back.

“You sure about that, Mick? You haven’t even seen what I’m wearing yet. I know you’re gonna love it.” He was still rubbing Mickey hard as he went in for another hot kiss.

“Goddamnit, Gallagher,” Mickey said, gasping for breath when he pulled back. Ian started kissing and sucking the crook of his neck, making his way up to Mickey’s ear.

Mickey was now hard as a fucking rock. He reached down to grab Ian, but Ian batted him away before his hand could go any further.

“You fucking suck.”

“Hmmm…maybe. That’s all up to you now, baby. Choose wisely.” Ian said against Mickey’s goosebump-covered skin before he pulled Mickey’s earlobe into his mouth, sucking and nibbling.

“Fu-uck…alright…shit…”

Ian slowly pulled off of Mickey’s ear, smiling. He kissed Mickey on the nose and reached for the Mickey ears.

“Such a good little mouse,” Ian said as he swiftly placed the Mickey ears on his boyfriend, laughing as he quickly ran away before Mickey could deck him in the fucking shoulder.

At this point, Mickey couldn’t deny it if he tried. He was 100% fucking dick-whipped. At least Ian was more than worth it.

 

*******

 

When Ian emerged from their bedroom, it was Mickey who went speechless this time. Ian was wearing black boots, what looked like a yellow prison jumpsuit but more form-fitting, accentuating all of Mickey’s favorite parts, and a yellow beanie with dog ears dangling from each side. Mickey’s breath caught when his eyes landed on the green collar around Ian’s neck. He swallowed hard.

“Oh, see something you like? You’re always calling me puppy, so I figured I’d run with it,” Ian said as he walked towards Mickey, giving him a cute flirty smile while batting his eyelashes innocently.

“Maybe. Could do without the ears, and the beanie covering your hair, but this—” Mickey said, eyes glued to the green collar. He licked and bit his bottom lip, a heated glare in his eyes. He hooked his fingers under the collar, yanking Ian forward against him. “This I could have so much fun with.”

“Fuck, Mick…” Ian said, his breath catching in his throat from Mickey pulling him forward so abruptly. Mickey practically eye-fucking him had Ian so fucking turned on, he didn’t know how much longer he could continue to hold out. Holding out earlier that day was torture enough, but Ian managed to stick to his plan. He couldn’t let himself cave now.

“So you’re Pluto, huh? Isn’t Pluto Mickey’s dog?” Mickey asked, seemingly innocently.

“Yeah…”

“So…does that make you my bitch then?” Mickey said, snarky as all fuck.

“A bitch is a female dog, asshole.” Ian rolled his eyes.

“Exactly!” Mickey said, laughing hysterically.

“Ha ha. Fuck you. No worries, I’m not finished with you yet…”

“Oh yeah?”

Ian walked over to the kitchen counter and quickly grabbed a permanent marker before Mickey could catch on to what he was doing. He walked back over to Mickey, turned him around and pinned him against the wall, trapping his upper arms in a manner that wouldn’t allow him to reach his face.

“WHAT THE FUCK, IAN?!”

Ian quickly scribbled a black dot onto Mickey’s nose with the marker, then let him go.

“Motherfucker!” Mickey ran to the bathroom, continuing to shout every curse word he could think of at his ginger fucker.

Ian joined Mickey in the bathroom with a tube of black face paint in hand. He proceeded to paint a small black dot on his nose. He looked over at Mickey in the mirror.

“You just don’t know how to behave, do you? Such a shame…”

“Fucking asshole…”

Ian walked out of the bathroom. “Now come on, we’re late for the party.”

 

*******

 

Ian made his way down the staircase toward the entryway of the apartment building. Mick was following close behind him, still cursing like a damn sailor. Everyone in the room was dancing, drinking, and having a fucking blast. He spotted Fiona at the bottom of the stairs wearing what looked like a slutty fairy outfit with fuck-me pumps, and she was talking and laughing with Kev, V and Lip. She looked up and smiled widely, eyes looking glazed over like a donut. Ian could tell she had already had way too much punch, and perhaps one too many hits off a joint.

“Heeeey Ian! Finally fuckin’ made it, was ‘bout to send out a search party! You’re so cute! Where’s Mick?”

“Hey Fi! He’s right here…say hey, Mick!” Ian stepped out of the way so they could see him.

The four of them went silent. Hell, even some of the guests around them went silent. It wasn’t long though before everyone erupted into hysterical laughter.

“Fuck all of you! I look damn fucking good, unlike you motherfuckers!”

Lip was the first to speak.

“Hey Mick! Who’s the leader of the club that’s made for you and me?”

Mickey promptly flipped him off. “Fuck you, Gallagher.”

“M-I-C-K-E-Y  M-O-U-S-E!” Ian chimed in. Mickey glared at him, eyes wide as saucers.

Fiona was next.

“Hey there! Hi there! HO there! You’re as welcome as can be!”

Now everyone chimed in. “M-I-C-K-E-Y  M-O-U-S-E!”

Kev put in his two cents. “Cute nose, Mick!”

Then V. “Those ears though! Awww!”

“FUCK YOU ALL VERY MUCH. I’ve had it with fucking Gallaghers today. Where’s the goddamn booze?” Mick yelled and surveyed the room, pushing forcefully past Ian and Lip once he located the food and drinks, leaving everyone laughing behind him.

“Nice work, brother! You got him good! Knew he wouldn’t be able to keep it from you,” Fiona said to Ian through nonstop giggling.

“You knew he forgot about the party?”

“Yep. Saw him this morning and called him out on it. Told him it’d be our little secret. But I knew he’d fail to keep it from ya. You both know each other way too well. It’s fucking scary.”

Ian laughed. “Yeah. You’re right. Which means I’ll probably end up paying for this later somehow. Pretty sure he’s already plotted his revenge.”

Meanwhile, Mick was leaned up against the wall next to the food and drinks, chugging a beer and chowing down on a finger sandwich, continuing to tell anyone who approached him with Mickey Mouse jokes to fuck right off. With that, he removed the Mickey ears, gloves, and as much of the permanent marker as he could, because fuck that shit. He’d made his appearance at the party, and now he’d had enough of these fucking jokers. Now he wanted to be fucking comfortable and drunk as shit in order to get through the rest of the Gallagher shenanigans. He finished his beer, then grabbed an empty cup and swooped down into the punch bowl. He bunched up his nose after one sip.

_The fuck is this kiddy juicebox shit? Where’s the booze? This punch is bullshit._

Then the lightbulb went off. Mickey smiled devilishly.

 _Time to really get this shitshow hopping_.

Mickey made his way to the stairs, but Ian grabbed his arm before he could head up.

“You tryin’ to run away, babe? You can’t escape me, ya know…” Ian said, swaying slightly.

“Nah, just…need to take a piss. I’ll be back in a sec,” Mickey said, giving Ian a quick kiss before heading up.

“Mmmm mkay. Hurry back.”

Mickey knew Ian was already pretty tipsy, so he’d have to make sure to keep an eye on him from there on out. Especially with what he was about to do to the bowl of Juicy Juice downstairs. He entered their apartment, grabbed a couple flasks out of the cabinet and surveyed his liquor options. He looked around for a good bit before his eyes landed on a bottle of 190-proof Everclear. He pulled it out and looked at it.

 _Bingo_.

“Yep. That’ll do.” He filled the flasks up with liquor, capped them and shoved one into each back pocket.

He headed downstairs and made his way back to the punch bowl. He looked to his left, then to his right. Mostly everyone was dancing in the front entryway, while others were off getting high or making out in dark corners. He pulled out the flasks and quickly started to pour their contents into the bowl.

“Bottoms up, motherfuckers. We’ll see who gets the last laugh.”

 

*******

 

It didn’t take long for Mickey’s magical concoction to take its effect on the majority of the partygoers. The mix of clumsy dancing, bad singing, and the stench of alcohol in the air let him know that he was more than successful. He stayed off to the side, talking with some of his coworkers from Patsy’s, as well as a couple of Ian’s EMT colleagues. They were the only ones smart enough—and sober enough—to figure out that the punch bowl had clearly been tainted. Ian was drunk as shit, but after a couple sips, even he was able to figure out what he knew Mickey did.

Ian came up to Mickey every so often for a sloppy drunken kiss, and perhaps a little bump n’ grind to get Mickey all hot and bothered. He tried to drag Mickey out to socialize, but that shit was so not happening. Other than that, Ian stayed out in the crowd like the social butterfly he was, dancing and singing along with the rest of the crowd.

When the song switched to “Time Warp,” Ian and Fiona went batshit nuts.

“Ohhhhh SHIT!” Ian and Fiona looked at each other and nodded, knowing exactly what the other was thinking. They took turns singing the intro to the song, getting their guests riled up as said guests began to assemble around them, preparing to dance to the main chorus.

Mickey, having never seen _Rocky Horror Picture Show_ , was wondering what in the actual fuck was going on. He leaned over toward one of his coworkers, who also looked a whole hell of a lot of confused.

“What kinda fucked up Hokey Pokey shit is this?!”

“I dunno, man…I’m just as clueless as you.”

Mickey turned back, and his eyes fell immediately on Ian, his mouth dropping open slightly as his breathing sped up. Somewhere in between dances and songs, Ian lost the beanie, his gorgeous red hair tousled every which way, and slightly dampened from sweat. The first couple buttons from his jumpsuit were unbuttoned, revealing the small patch of chest hair that Mickey fucking loved. He still had the green collar on as well.

 _Fuck me…_ , Mickey thought. Or maybe he said it out loud. So what?

Besides looking like a whole hot fucking meal, Ian was having the time of his life—he was giggling nonstop, radiating pure joy and happiness as he danced with the rest of the guests. His smile was so wide and bright that surely he could knock the entire crowd right off their feet. Hell, he was certainly knocking Mickey off of his. And as far as Mickey was concerned, Ian was the only other person in the room besides himself, his light so blinding that no one else could be seen, even if they tried. Mickey would give up everything he knew just to see Ian like this all day, every day for the rest of their lives.

Well, sans the alcohol.

Ian must have sensed Mickey staring at him, because he soon turned his head to connect with Mickey’s gaze.

 

_…but it’s the pelvic thrust,_

_that really drives you insane…._

 

Mickey cocked an eyebrow and gave a small knowing smile as Ian expertly thrusted his hips to the song, keeping his eyes glued on Mickey as he did so. Ian knew how much Mickey liked watching him dance. He knew the effect it had on him all too well. And in that thin yellow jumpsuit? Well, there wasn’t much space in there to conceal a 9-inch monster, especially when the person wearing said jumpsuit was literally jumping up and down all night. Ian left nothing to the imagination, which Mickey both loved and hated, because he didn’t want anyone else seeing what was most definitely all his.

Mickey grabbed one of Ian’s cupcakes off the food display and continued to watch Ian dance. Every now and then Ian caught Mickey licking through the frosting slowly as Mickey stared at him, which caused Ian’s body to quiver with heated anticipation.

The song changed to the _True Blood_ theme song. Finally, a song Mickey was familiar with, considering Ian made him fucking binge-watch that shit with him.

 

_When you came in, the air went out,_

_and every shadow filled up with doubt…_

 

Mickey captured Ian’s glowing green eyes again, except this time, Ian sauntered over toward him with a slow, sexy swagger in every step he took.

 

_…but before the night is through…_

 

Once Ian was standing in front of Mickey, he swiped his right index finger through the frosting, then brought his finger to Mickey’s full, pink lips, smearing a bit of frosting on them before Mickey opened his mouth to allow Ian entrance.

 

_…I wanna do bad things with you._

 

Mickey wrapped his tongue around the bottom side of Ian’s finger, and Ian pulled back slowly. Ian couldn’t breathe, his mouth forming a small “O” as he watched the show Mickey was giving him. Ian could have come right then and there, watching that perfect fucking mouth at work. Mickey swirled his tongue around Ian’s fingertip, giving it one last suck before he released it with a small pop. He licked the remaining frosting off his lips.

“Jesus fuck, Mick…” Ian shuddered.

Mickey didn’t waste any time. He threw the cupcake on the ground, hooked his left index finger underneath Ian’s collar, pulled Ian against him and crashed their lips together for a desperate, hungry kiss. Ian joined his tongue with Mickey’s, the combined flavors of frosting, alcohol, and Mickey sending Ian into overdrive and deepening their kiss. Mickey’s right hand was entangled in Ian’s messy red hair, tugging slightly. Ian placed his hands low on Mickey's waist, running a finger teasingly under the waistband of Mickey's pants before reaching further down to get a handful of perfect ass.

“Mmmm taste so good, Mick…gonna turn you out so fucking good…” Ian muttered in between breaths.

Mickey broke their kiss, gasping for air.

“Good, cuz that’s happening NOW. Let’s fucking go.”

“Why? Party’s not over yet, M—”

“Do I look like I give a fuck? There’s one more cupcake here that needs cream filling, and he’s gonna get it right fuckin’ now. Wanna turn me out? Then COME THE FUCK ON. Sick of this holding out bullshit. NEVER. AGAIN.”

Ian’s drunk ass couldn’t help but giggle as Mickey pulled Ian behind him by the collar, leading them up the stairs toward their apartment.

As if he could have held out on Mickey any longer. He was an absolute sucker for anything Mickey.

Especially the sucking part.

**Author's Note:**

> Thanks so much for reading, hope you liked it! If you did, let me know! A special thanks to @themetalmotel for this awesome edit she made for my story! Mickey Mouse Milkovich is fucking HOT, and Ian is the cutest pup ever! Oh, and take a good look at that smaller pumpkin ;P
> 
>  
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> [](https://www.flickr.com/photos/spankingshakespeare/44900393854/in/dateposted-public/)  
> 


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